Loud, annoying, bragging douches, know it all’s, narcissistic, mean – These are just a few traits we categorize as negative.
We can all fit ourselves into someones annoying list, even though we don’t want to admit it. That we have some bad traits and flaws here and there, we can accept. But no one really wants to see the worst of the worst in ourselves. We are perfect, it’s usually other people who’ve got shit twisted. Pointing the finger at other peoples flaws are easy, but how easy can we turn that finger around and point it at ourselves?
So, first of all, here I am writing a list about acknowledging your negatives. Why, woman, why?! In a world where we are pushing positivity to the maxed out level, here I come and tell you to think about what makes you suck. Well, to strengthen your positives you need to be aware of your negatives. Let’s make it clear that we are not talking about your appearance!! We are focusing on our personality traits.
Our reactions to everything around us is something we do unconsciously. We get mad at other cars in traffic, we get mad when a person is taking forever at the check out at Trader Joe’s, we get jealous when we see someone we feel is more successful or beautiful than we are. These are things we “just do”. And I want you to know when you do it, and why you do it.
I love to be right, and hate to be wrong (duh). I’m a terrible loser (even thought I’ve learned to hide it pretty well over the years). I can be jealous, I don’t open up about emotions easy, I can zone out very often. Not sure if zoning out is such bad of a trait, I guess it depends on the situation. These are just a few traits that I know I have. How other people see me, I might not even know.
Let your friends roast you – You need to get roosted, hard and crispy over an open flame and feel the burn. Okay, not really, but have your friends and family, whoever you truly trust and you know will be honest, tell you about your negative traits. What do you do that makes them sad, angry, pissed off, feeling taken for granted?
Why do you do them – If you want to go deep into why you behave this way, you can pull out a pen and a paper, and write down all the negative traits of your family and friends. We get effected by the world around us, and our upbringing might hold the answer to where your bad traits developed from. Identify the root of the problem and become aware of it. Let’s say you have a hard time opening up to people, and can be perceived as distant or cold. Maybe, you didn’t get that much word love from your parents? Break the inherited chain of bad habits!
Slap your hand when it reaches for the cookie jar – Track your shit! Write down every time you slip up. Track your bad habits in a journal, or in your phone. Whatever works for you. Become aware of them. Own them, not in the sense that they are awesome, but something you want to change. Change only happens when you’ve determined the problem. By writing them down, you will catch yourself red handed, and have you think about what triggered you behavior.
How does it effect others – Bad traits and habits goes beyond you. It usually effects others, and puts the whole “good energy balance” out of order. If the things you are doing are effecting people in a really bad way, you need to make a change. When it goes beyond yourself, you are almost required to do something about the problem.
Make others point at you – Tell the people around you, that every time you do something nasty, they should call you out out it. Bluntly. Have them explain why, and what you did exactly, so you can start seeing the type of scenarios that triggers your habit.
Perfection, there is no such a thing. Bad days are a thing! And they can effect us, and our decision making. But, if we can do our best to improve the way we react to certain situations, we can create better energies all around us, affecting the world and ourselves for the better.